It was all wrong from the beginning, you know. Our relationship started with an argument! Then I didn't hear from him for ten days (or however long it was), until I got a stupid e-card with a cartoon of a man with his foot in his mouth. He apologised for being absent for so long. Apparently, he'd been in hospital for a week... due to alcohol poisoning (!).

• He sent my best friend, who was male, abusive text messages.
• He ignited a lighter, let it burn at an angle so the metal would get hot, then tried to burn my hand purposely with force.
• He showed me a pocketknife. Then tried to cut me with it. It wouldn't matter, he said, it wasn't sharp anyway. Besides, he and his mates at the army did it to each other all the time.
• He demanded attention in the middle of the night, ringing my phone, and ringing the house phone, waking up the entire house, when I switched my phone off. If I left the house phone off the hook as well, I'd have about 30 to 40 angry text messages waiting for me the next day. Claiming I didn't love him, and more.
• He put me on one of those turn-round-and-round-and-round things at a playground, and turned me round and round and round, and when I squealed "Stoooop" he turned me faster. And when I screamed "Stop!" in desperation he turned me faster still. And when I demanded "MICHAEL, STOP!" in fury and disbelief, he turned me faster once again. Not until I had been silent for a long time did he stop pushing, but he never stopped the turning. I had to wait, angry, sick to the stomach, dizzy and feeling very unwell for the turning to stop. I had to lie in the grass for a good 10 minutes before I could do the slightest thing again. And he didn't understand why I was upset, or angry.

I suppose that was just the normal way to treat his girlfriend.

To be fair, he also:

• Sent me chocolates;
• Sent me letters in packages full of glitter gel pens, stickers, fridge magnets, et cetera;
• Bought me a diamond ring;
• Tried to take me shopping (he was very disappointed at how un-girl-like I was: not interested at all in anything, simply because I didn't need anything at the time);
• Sent me a �300 mp3-CD-player I wanted, as a surprise for my birthday (whilst we were in a big fight, by the way).

I suppose he expected me to be his spoilt little girl. I suppose he never understood, though of course I like to be spoilt, I'm not a girly, don't like glitter gel pens (or anything 'glitter' for that matter) or any nonsense like that, and I don't put on make up, either!

(I'd just like to add to this, that my best friend, despite the abuse and his worries concerning this 'boyfriend' of mine, still brought Michael and me a lovely pot of tea in bed in the morning, when we were all staying at his nan's place.)

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I feel so