After being alone for two days, embedding my atmosphere into the house, transforming all the rusty family habits I was involuntarily accustomed to into my own ways and doings; after making this place livable for myself, not having to adapt to family members' disagreeable lifestyles whilst suppressing my clashing emotions for everyone's own good; after putting myself in charge of my every single move, and adopting all responsibilities maturely and satisfyingly, the inhabiters all arrived back home with such displeasing suddenness, that I feel completely out of place: I feel like I've been invaded by barbarians and robbed from my own identity.

All the roles I'd assigned to every little object in the house have been discharged, all the values I'd given to outstanding phenomena have been ridiculed and ignored nonchalantly, all the structure I'd created has been destroyed, and all the emotional bonds I'd built up with certain customs have been abruptly broken. (And I am no longer the most important factor in this house to keep things running.)

How on Earth am I going to survive another six months of this inhuman chaos and stressing disorder?

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I feel so